Salute to Dr. David Walker

"Do you have the consciousness of what you desire?" ~Dr. David Walker

He was one of my heroes in life...a wonderful friend, colleague, teacher - how does one remember such a powerful force like David? His website for his Church shows a welcome video from him...he was just a darling to me.

One of his most powerful lessons was one in which he discussed time, and since time is a stresser for many people you may really appreciate the lesson: it is NEVER about time, it is about consciousness. So, I created this affirmation for this: I make best use of my consciousness every day.

If I do that, I will never regret or feel guilty or stressed about my day - I did the best with my consciousness and that is good enough for me...BTW, the name of his book is: You are Enough - get it, read, it honor it, and be it...it is the best that we can do to honor his life.

thanks David...for all the memories...mel

Laughter to Reduce Stress - just do it! (from about.com)

Laughter is good for your soul- -and your body!

Research has shown health benefits of laughter ranging from strengthening the immune system to reducing food cravings¹ to increasing one's threshold for pain². There's even an emerging therapeutic field known as humor therapy³ to help people heal more quickly, among other things. Humor also has several important stress relieving benefits.

Stress Management Benefits of Laughter:

• Hormones: Laughter reduces the level of stress hormones like cortisol⁴, epinephrine⁵ (adrenaline⁶), dopamine and growth hormone. It also increases the level of health-enhancing hormones like endorphins, and neurotransmitters. Laughter increases the number of antibody-producing cells and enhances the effectiveness of T cells. All this means a stronger immune system, as well as fewer physical effects of stress.

• Physical Release: Have you ever felt like you "have to laugh or I'll cry"? Have you experienced the cleansed feeling after a good laugh? Laughter provides a physical and emotional release.

• Internal Workout: A good belly laugh exercises the diaphragm, contracts the abs and even works out the shoulders, leaving muscles more relaxed afterward. It even provides a good workout for the heart.

• Distraction: Laughter brings the focus away from anger⁷, guilt, stress⁸ and negative emotions in a more beneficial way⁹ than other mere distractions.

• Perspective: Studies show¹⁰ that our response to stressful events can be altered by whether we view something as a 'threat' or a 'challenge'. Humor can give us a more lighthearted perspective and help us view events as 'challenges', thereby making them less threatening and more positive.

• Social Benefits of Laughter: Laughter connects us with others. Also, laughter is contagious¹¹, so if you bring more laughter into your life, you can most likely help others around you to laugh more, and realize these benefits as well. By elevating the mood of those around you, you can reduce their stress levels, and perhaps improve the quality of social interaction you experience with them, reducing your stress level even more!

How To Use Laughter:

Laughter is one of my all-time favorite stress management¹² strategies because it's free, convenient, and beneficial in so many ways. You can get more laughter in your life with the following strategies:

• T.V. and Movies: There's no shortage of laughter opportunities from the entertainment, both at the theater and in the aisles of the video stores¹³, as well as at home with T.V. comedies¹⁴. While wasting your time watching something marginally funny may actually frustrate you, watching truly hilarious movies and shows is an easy way to get laughter into your life whenever you need it.

• Laugh With Friends: Going to a movie or comedy club with friends is a great way to get more laughter in your life. The contagious effects of laughter may mean you'll laugh more than you otherwise would have during the show, plus you'll have jokes to reference at later times. Having friends over for a party or game night is also a great setup for laughter and other good feelings.

• Find Humor In Your Life: Instead of complaining about life's frustrations, try to laugh about them. If something is so frustrating or depressing it's ridiculous, realize that you could 'look back on it and laugh.' Think of how it will sound as a story you could tell to your friends, and then see if you can laugh about it now. With this attitude, you may also find yourself being more lighthearted and silly, giving yourself and those around you more to laugh about. Approach life in a more mirthful way and you'll find you're less stressed about negative events, and you'll achieve the health benefits of laughter. (See this article on maintaining a sense of humor¹⁵.

• 'Fake It Until You Make It': Just as studies show the positive effects of smiling occur whether the smile is fake or real, faked laughter also provides the benefits mentioned above. So smile more, and fake laughter; you'll still achieve positive effects, and the fake merriment may lead to real smiles and laughter.

• More on Having Fun: See these additional suggestions on laughing more and having fun¹⁶ in your life.

_{Sources:
Bennett MP, Lengacher C. Humor and Laughter May Influence Health: III. Laughter and Health Outcomes.¹⁷ Evidence-Based Complementary and Alternative Medicine, March 2008.
Bennett MP, Zeller JM, Rosenberg L, McCann J. The Effect of Mirthful Laughter on Stress and Natural Killer Cell Activity.¹⁸. Alternative Therapies in Health and Medicine, March-April 2003.
Berk LS, Felten DL, Tan SA, Bittman BB, Westengard J. Modulation of Neuroimmune Parameters During the Eustress of Humor-Associated Mirthful Laughter.¹⁹. Alternative Therapies in Health and Medicine, March 2001.
Skinner N, Brewer N. The Dynamics of Threat and Challenge Appraisals Prior to Stressful Achievement Events.²⁰ Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, September 2002.}

Learn to Meditate

Click on this link:

Free Meditation Course!

One of the best tools for stress relief is meditation...not the 30 minute type three times a day, but short interludes...this is a great course starting on April 1...join in - it is free!!

Give it your attention, it will pay you back...

Listening...REALLY listening...

Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self confidence. ---- Robert Frost

I am quite disturbed by all of the anger and bitterness being exhibited about health reform...can't we all just get along? We have know since the Civil War that there have always been differences about how much the federal government should be involved in - vs. the States. This is not new. And...I would guess in another 50 years we will be having the same debate. Differences are good...BUT, only when we are willing to listen and learn.

You listen to the "other" and they listen to you. That is how it is supposed to work...then you walk away from each other having learned something, gained insight, became vulnerable to another point of view, and we can agree to disagree...it is OK!!! we don't need to yell at each other, spit at others, use explatives, that is not a civilized society. What are teaching the youth?

We are going backwards in this country with this form of communication. REAL listening requires us to set aside our differences, and hear the other...Stephen Covey: Seek first to understand and then to be understood. You don't have to surrender your values to listen....just create space to learn something, that's all...

Let's try this versus that.

What's Right in Your World?

When you realize that nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you! ~ Lao Tse

Approaching life from the perspective and attitude that things are good, is a very different way of life. I am not a master of it yet I know that when I look for what's right, my whole body feels different, as if it has turned into another "being".

It takes conscious awareness to make this happen. And that also means that I cannot be focused on the past or future, but the present. That is the trick. To look at life from the past "lens" or from the future "lens", will not allow you to celebrate what's right with the world.

Seeing what is "right" vs. what is wrong is a stress-free way to explore your spiritual path.

Embrace Conflict

(thanks to Cheryl Richardson for these wonderful thoughts)

"Marion Woodman tells us that wholeness comes from learning to "hold the tension of the opposites."

We live in a world of duality. There's daylight and nighttime, summer and winter, good and evil. It's the nature of living as a human being on earth to deal with the tension of opposites. And yet, navigating the complex feelings that come from holding this tension can be stressful and challenging at best. You interview for a new job, for example, and find yourself anxiously waiting to hear how you did while knowing that at the same time you need to be patient and detached from the outcome. Or, you try to be a good parent by encouraging your son to go out into the world to live a full, rich life, while everything inside you begs to hold tight to keep him safe.

How do we hold the tension of the opposites and still thrive and enjoy our lives? What can we do to make this experience less stressful? Here are a few things that helped me:

Give voice to your feelings. As I grappled with mixed emotions during the trip, I felt alone and a little crazy. After all, here I was in one of the most beautiful cities in the world and part of me wanted to be home. It didn't make sense. But, once I stopped suffering in silence and shared my thoughts with Michael, I discovered that he felt it, too. Sharing my feelings and knowing I wasn't alone immediately made me feel better.

Honor the opposites. Rather than judge one side as better or worse than the other, give both parts of you equal consideration. I spent some time by myself writing about the traveler in me who was thoroughly enjoying seeing new places, meeting new people, and having new adventures. And I also wrote about the other part that loved our home, missed Poupon, and wanted the comfort and peace of familiar routines. What I soon discovered was that giving time and space to both parts of me made me feel stronger and more capable of being with the tension.

Strengthen your ability to hold both. Once I felt stronger, I had a glimpse of what Marion was talking about when she said that "wholeness" comes from holding the tension of the opposites. Rather than try to exorcise or ignore my uncomfortable feelings, I needed to see the choice to be with both as a kind of "inner training session." As I centered myself in the tension, I imagined weaving parts of me together into a stronger, more mature woman. By doing this I was developing an emotional muscle that would ultimately allow me to bring more of who I am to the world. "

I personally love paradox...it is fun to see that two things, that are opposite, are both true...stress, yes, and good stress...it is all how we see it with our eyes. Rev. Mel

"New Frame"?

Cognitive reframing--the wonderful practice of looking at things in a more positive light in order to experience them as less stressful--is a simple and effective stress reliever. And there are unlimited opportunities to practice cognitive reframing to maintain a more optimistic (i.e. less stressful) world view.

Sometimes it helps to see how others can take lemons and make lemonade; sometimes it's nice to get a pat on the back for a brilliant example of cognitive reframing you've used in your own.I would be curious to see how YOU do this...let me know...

"Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility." ~ Dietrich Bonhoeffer

I think the only way to be ready to serve the world in the best manner possible is to reframe the situation that is stressing you right now, then recognize that it is less important that what you have to do in life...and then take action. Your gifts are too important to hold back...reframe and enjoy the joy!